Friday, December 13, 2013

Boldness and Confidence!

Here is a glimpse of the course...But it is now covered in snow...

Bend, Oregon…Here I come! This weekend I am racing in Club Cross Country Championships! I am racing with a beautiful group of women; some are old college teammates, some are even old high school teammates, and some are new friends. I was blessed this fall to get to run some workouts with them- a key ingredient I find that I need to stay motivated and truly experience the gift of training and racing! I look forward to a weekend of quality time with these great people!

The race is a 6K and from what I understand, it is “true European cross country”- full of mud, hay bales, snow, and any other challenging element that is bound to challenge me mentally. In my head, I love the idea of being a warrior and getting to run a “hard-core” race and race to see who has the most guts. When I am really honest with myself, however, I realize that I am inwardly a coward and easily give into the temptation to let go of the fleeting opportunities in a race to make a move or take a risk. I have been trying to prepare mentally for this race by repeating to myself that this is a sweet chance to be tough and that it is way more fun to really engage and give all I have than to be a chicken. I even chose the corny theme song “Roar” by Katy Perry in order to inundate my mind with the belief that I am tough. I believe that this approach is helpful and that I do have to build up a stock of mental ammunition, but I think there has to be something deeper than just figuring out how to trick your mind.

I truly believe God’s timing is impeccable and he provides all my needs in a way that I feel completely undeserving. This week I experienced God’s grace in a letter. I love mail by the way…This letter was from Jodi, the leader of the trip I took this summer to Europe with Athlete’s in Action. Throughout the summer I chose a truth about who I am because of what Jesus did for me, and it became my theme for my races. I chose the truth “I have boldness and confidence,” referencing Proverbs 3:26 “For the Lord will be at your side and will keep your foot from being snared.” I opened the letter and inside was a scrap-booked card with the verse and the truth! I couldn’t believe how impeccable the timing of receiving this letter was! It was an instant heart check prompting me to remember that it is the Lord that will enable me to be mentally tough. It is the Lord’s strength that will allow me to take the momentary opportunities to compete and to embrace being a warrior. It is the Lord that will give me boldness and confidence! And so, I head into this race with an awareness of my cowardice, but also a sense of gratitude that the Lord is with me and I will be a cross country warrior for him!